The Land Down Under--New Zealand

Our final stop is on the far side of the world—New Zealand. It’s in the “Land down under,” and Bill and Frances Flaws, natives of the north island, recall with fondness eating the practice of Christmas dinner on the beach. The traditional dish is roast lam with new potatoes, plum pudding (with a real silver nickel inside if you’re lucky), and fresh peas and carrots.

The Flaws described the national sport of rugby and evenings of listening to the radio in a quiet country town while they were courting. They broke the usual racial divisions to become friends with the Maori, the native people from whom originated the famous pre-football game “Hakka” dance. They were very loving and family-oriented once you got to know them, Flaws said, but that was difficult.

Bill Flaws said that New Zealand has more freedom—fishing and hunting are simple and easy there. This is probably because there are so few people though. After a moment’s thought, Flaws said, “I once heard that there were more sheep there than people, and it was probably true.”

 The Flaws were more somber in recounting the availability of education in the land they left. There were only four universities in New Zealand while they were growing up, and so they were highly competitive. Frances Flaws had wanted to be a teacher, but her experiences with fierce-some nuns in a Catholic college (like high school with an extra year, but emphasizing math, science, and English) “put her off.”

The couple came to the U.S. after they joined The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. They wanted their children to have more opportunities to associate with youth of their new faith. Still, they would like to travel more. Bill Flaws wants to see the famous Scottish battlefield of “Braveheart” where his mother used to play. Frances Flaws would like to get back to her Irish roots.

“Don’t get me started on immigration,” Bill Flaws said warningly when I asked about government.

“Well, it took us seven years, and it’s irksome,” his wife added. They have little patience for the hot debate in illegal immigration in Arizona, the state they now call home.

The Flaws were happy to talk about the beauty of the land they left. They described the beaches, the solitude, the cable cars going up the nearby mountains, and the famous Pahutakawa, the “Christmas tree of New Zealand.” They had books full of pictures that made Hawaii look dull.

“It was a beautiful place to grow up,” said Frances Flaws.

“This is where you want to go on your honeymoon,” added her husband

Sashimi, Shame and Culture Shock--Japan

  Two women talk about their lives and their children's lives. It's not unusual, a motherly thing to do. One is frustrated with the decisions her son is making; the other tries to be sympathetic. Finally, the first one ends with, "Oh, it's his life!" The second woman is Kyoko Handly, a native of Japan who has lived in the U.S. since her college days, and she is rather surprised.
In Japan, Handly was raised in more of a collective culture, where an entire family would get involved in the poor decisions of a single member. In Japan, there is freedom, but the parents of a wayward child would not feel at ease living their normal lives until the issue was resolved. Handly still finds it puzzling. "People don't think deeply here," she said.
   Handly described the culture shock she experiences every time she travels between her two countries. The Japanese airport is clean and nice, with a sign reading, "Welcome to Japan." She explained that in Japan, people are more polite, and no one has to worry about going out at night. Even getting a straight "yes" or "no" answer can be challenging in Japan, because everyone is very concerned about what others would think.
  Having lived in both the U.S. and Japan, Handly can pick and choose favorite qualities of each nation. She loves the people in Japan--much of her family lives there. The healthcare is a pain, though, with the long lines that come with universal healthcare. The food, especially the Sashimi, gives Japan another plus. On the other hand, government services in Japan sometimes vary according to their social status.
  Handly came to the U.S. over 20 years ago to see what it was like. And now, she has.